First Date Dilemma

First dates are all about getting to know a little more about each other and seeing if there is enough there to take it further.  In our eagerness to find love, sometimes we forget the importance of keeping this initial contact light and brief.  Of course, much will depend on how much communication you have had with each other prior to meeting, also.  The whole idea about this first meeting is not to spend the day together, but to share a brief time together, learn about each other, size each other up, and see how you interact with each other.

 

Coffee, Brunch, Breakfast and Other Early Options

One of my favorite times to meet someone is early in the day.  The reason I like these options so much is that is provides for a more relaxed and stress-free meeting.  If you choose to meet for coffee, the meeting can be as brief as either of you wants it to be.  If you are really unsure, I would stick with a coffee meeting so you do not have to be there long, if you do not want to.  This is also a very inexpensive way to meet, if you are unsure of the person prior to meeting.

Brunch and breakfast are also low-cost options that provide minimal stress for both parties.  These options give you a little more time together to get to know each other.  Because brunch and breakfast are generally served very quickly or are buffet style, you still have a fairly easy out if the date is not working out for you.  I really enjoy the light early day atmosphere of these type of dates.  It provides a great environment for talking without all the potential pressures of a dinner date.  The only down side of this is that many restaurants do brunch only on Sundays, and that means if you attend Sunday religious services, you have very limited options on a Saturday.

If your date goes well, you are both available, and you want to do something else together, this early date provides ample time to spend even more time together.  I will add a caution here, though.  I would not overdo the time together on this initial meeting.  Men tend to feel overwhelmed and may want to pull away if you seem too needy on this first date.  Use good judgment on the amount of time to choose to spend together on the first date.

   Dinner or Drinks

My advice here would be to NOT do just drinks.  First off, it is very hard to have an actual conversation in many of the places where drinks are served.  The whole idea is to get to know each other, and that cannot be accomplished.  The other caution I will mention is that when you meet a complete stranger for drinks, you should always use extreme caution.  Never leave your drink unattended – EVER!  If you must use the restroom, finish your drink and tell your date you do not want another one, even if you do.  You can always order one when you get back.  I also caution on meeting for drinks because it is not wise to drink alcohol with no food on a date where you are trying to evaluate someone to potentially have a relationship with.  I am not saying you should not have a drink, but only to use caution and good judgment.

My choice here would always be a nice dinner – and by nice, I do not mean it has to be expensive.  There are plenty of great date restaurants that offer affordable food, a nice wine selection, and great atmosphere to talk.  These are not your chain restaurants, either.  Choose something cozy, so you can have a nice conversation.  This atmosphere is great for gauging chemistry and attraction to each other.  Relax, enjoy your date and get to know each other!  It is all in the journey, so enjoy the ride!

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