It is hard enough dating without any additional pressures and stresses. First dates are even harder. One of my rules, is that I do NOT want to kiss a complete stranger on a first date! No way, no how! I do not know enough about someone I just met to be any form of intimate with them, and that includes kissing. First off, I do not know his oral hygiene, which is super important. Second, gum disease is a bacterial infection and can be spread person to person via saliva. I know this is not sexy, but it is fact, and I think about these things, as should you!
Men, if you just met someone, you should have enough respect for them not to kiss them or touch them inappropriately. It is just not okay! Women, you need to have more respect for yourselves and set boundaries to get to know someone on a personal level before you ever think of getting anywhere near physical. Save all of that for a time when you truly know each other. Isn’t that the point? A good man will want to get to know you as a person and respect you enough to do that before he gets physical with you. Do you really want that guy who wants everything right away? Imagine how many others he has been with this way? No, thank you! I feel I deserve much better than that, and so do you! I am not saying kissing is bad, I am merely saying to save it for after you know the person a little better. What is the rush?
I realize there are people who will totally disagree with me on this subject, and that is okay. I write from a “lived and learned” perspective and your lessons may have been different than mine. As I pointed out in my last post, a first date should be all about getting to know the person better, and be very conversation-oriented. Now, if you do hold a different view, that is fine. This is just my recommendation to finding Mr. Maybe. Be physical too soon, and he has nothing to look forward to, so beware if your goal is finding a guy to keep. Of course, I realize there are always exceptions.
Mr. Maybe is out there! I would rather wait for him to arrive in my life than go through all the heartache with Mr. Wrong and waste my time. Take the time to know who you are choosing to be with. If he is Mr. Maybe, he will still be there. If he goes away, then he was not the right one anyway. Ladies, you need to set the boundaries and stick to them! This, sadly, is up to you. The right man will respect those boundaries and they will respect you! You deserve that and nothing less than that! So save that first kiss for someone special. Waiting will make it a special and memorable moment for both of you!
Dating After 40 